


Star-crossed Lovers

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 09:50:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10988466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Levi x Petra. A look at their early years, and the effect that Petra’s death had on Levi. WAFFY and sentimental, with a touch of humour in places ;)





	Star-crossed Lovers

Petra saluted strongly, standing in the line of the Scout’s regiment along with the other new recruits. Captain Levi, a man she had heard so much about, started to pace back and forth.

“You have all pledged your lives to the advancement of the understanding of the Titan threat. I will make this clear; this is the most dangerous section of the garrison. I won’t bark statistics at you, but I will say that the more you learn now, the more likely you will survive the first mission and the less likely you will simply amount to nothing more than an edible distraction for the titans. Now, instructions aren’t always black or white. I will know how seriously you take the scout’s regiment by how closely you follow commands.”

Everyone gave a shout in recognition.  

Levi turned to face the crowd directly. “Your first mission – pick a room in the mansion and clean it!”

Many other scout members gasped, but Petra stood strongly and saluted as Levi walked away.

She would definitely put her all into it the Captain’s instruction.

~*~

“Next!”

She stepped forward and saluted. “Petra Ral.”

“Show me.”

Petra marched strongly to the room. Levi surveyed her, testing whether she would buckle under psychological pressure, however, she remained composed.

Satisfied, he opened the door and gasped. Petra was pleased that she had gotten such an intense reaction out of Levi, but he was looking into the room with… horror?

Peeking through, she gave a shout as she saw the condition. A cat and dog had snuck in, and had used her room for a rough game of hide and seek. There was mess everywhere, and the animals must have trampled through mud beforehand.

Levi looked furious. “Do it again!”

She barely collected herself enough to acknowledge his command.

~*~

“Hm, I haven’t seen that Petra girl since breakfast this morning,” said one of the men.

“I guess she couldn’t handle the pressure and went home,” said another, laughing.

Overhearing them, Levi maintained an emotionless demeanour. But he couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed inside. While not outstanding in any way, he’d thought the girl looked like the stubborn type.

Curious, he wandered over to the room Petra was cleaning and opened the door. To his surprise, it was sparkling clean. Petra was asleep on the floor, exhausted from the work and the lack of sustenance.

One final piece of rubbish lay in front of her. Levi went over and picked it up. A faint smile came across his features.  

~*~

The next day, Levi surprised all of them by getting them up at 3AM. Shouting harsh instructions, the recruits blearily tried to ready themselves. Finally, all of them were at the foot of their bed, standing to attention.

Levi walked down, whacking the recruits in places where their clothes or gear weren’t properly worn. Finally, he reached Petra.

“Button your shirt,” he growled, looking thoroughly irritated.

She gasped in shock, then saluted and turned around, fixing herself.

“Everyone outside and give me five miles!” Levi roared. “The last one will be punished!”

They all saluted, and ran.

Petra was lightweight, and she thankfully was not at the back of the pack, even though she was slower than most of the recruits who looked buff.

They were close to the finish. Everyone was exhausted.

One of the recruits, Juan, slipped and twisted his ankle. Terrified, he shouted, and tried to stand. Petra ran over to help him up, and started to drag him, forcing him to run even though he was in pain.

Because of this, they were now in last place.

She pulled back, and strongly said “Go ahead. We’re all a team. I would be in a better position to handle the consequences.”

He looked aghast, then nodded. “Thank you. I will remember this.”

He sprinted ahead. When he was out of sight, Petra ran in the direction of the camp.

Running through the gates, the other recruits were already onto their daily exercises.

“How nice of you to join us!” snarled Levi. “Perhaps you would like to explain why you’re slower than an injured person!”

The other recruits were all looking at her, even though they were still exercising.

“I’m sorry, Sir! I’ll try harder, Sir!” she said strongly, trying to control her fear.

“That’s not an explanation,” he responded, looking at her with eyes of a tiger.

She trembled, trying to think of an answer that was truthful. “I just couldn’t go any faster, Sir!”

Levi looked furious. “What aren’t you telling me?!” he hissed.

Petra gulped. There was no getting around his perceptive abilities. Panicking, she answered. “I wanted to come last, since it would be fair.”

Levi remained silent, scrutinizing her. “You… let her take the hit for you?” he said, and turned around to look at Juan.

“Yes, Sir,” he replied, trembling. “She insisted. She said that she’d be in better condition to face the punishment. I told her I’d remember it.”

“Yes, _memories_ are all we have of our comrades who take the fall for us.” With that, Levi grabbed Petra by the scuff of her shirt and threw her into the far wall, leaving a blood spatter where her head had impacted. “You just _killed_ her. She died for _you_.”

The recruits stopped moving, horrified.

“Do you really think that she was in a better condition to take that than you, even with your sore foot?” Levi said through gritted teeth, staring Juan down.

Juan was freaking out too much to respond. All he could do was stand there wide-eyed, trembling.

“Continue!” ordered Levi, clapping his hands.

All of the recruits saluted and went back to exercising, even though they were all visibly shaken.

Levi wandered over to Petra. “Get up.”

Now partially conscious, she pushed herself up, trying hard to remain vertical despite her dizziness.

Finally, she was overcome and fell to the ground, eyes open but not seeing anything.

Levi grabbed her by the back of the shirt and dragged her to the medic bay.

~*~

When she awoke, it was late afternoon. Gasping, Petra sat up, ignoring the wave of nausea.

“Take it easy!” the nurse said, smiling, showing her a cold lunch on the side of her bed.

Panicking, Petra pushed away her food and sprinted down the hall, managing to remain upright despite her swaying.

She stumbled out into the now-deserted exercise yard, and started to do the rounds.

For an hour she performed the movements to the best of her ability given her light muscles, occasionally stopping to throw up, which eventually morphed into dry-retching. 

Heaving nothing, she noticed a blurry pair of boots in her field of vision. Tracing them upwards, she realised it was Levi.

Immediately, she stood to attention, trying her best to stop swaying, but failing.

“Do you normally do things on your own, without following any instruction?” he said in a deathly-cold tone.

Petra gaped. “I apologise, Sir! I didn’t want to be behind the others.”

“Look at yourself,” came the stern reply. “You’re _miles_ behind them, regardless of where you placed in the race. You can’t even stand straight. Titans have an uncanny ability to go towards those who are weak or injured, and you’re _both_. You’re living in a fairytale. You think you’ve accomplished something by pushing yourself today, but in reality all you’ve succeeded in doing is killing yourself. Twice.”

“Yes, Sir!” she replied, close to tears but managing to control it somehow.

“You’re dismissed. Go and have some food and rest. Have a think about whether this is appropriate for you. Remember, it’s not only your life you could be throwing away, but your teammates! Or even some villagers who would die because of your failure!” He turned and strode away.

She saluted, then left.

~*~

The next morning, Levi inspected them. Petra still felt sick, but was doing her utmost to hide it. He walked along, eventually coming to her.

“Are you able to train?” he asked.

“Yes, Sir!”

Levi remained scrutinizing her. Despite her best efforts, she started to sway.

“Lying to yourself about your own limits isn’t going to change them,” he said coldly. “The stables need cleaning. See if you can do _that_ , and then work your way up to being able to merely _stand on two feet_. The rest of you, ten miles!”

Petra stood looking as the wave of recruits sprinted in front of her, passing her by in a blur. Some were giving sympathetic looks; others a look of disgust.  

All she could do was put her utmost efforts into whatever task she’d been given.

~*~

Throughout the day, more recruits joined her as a remedy for their attitude problem. She was in the stable loft, resting the pail filled with trash on the window pane, trying to get her energy back.

“Here, let me help you,” said one of them. Before she could respond, he gripped the pail and tried to take it away. Unfortunately, he didn’t have a good grasp and the contents went flying out the window.

All of them rushed there and looked down, frozen as they saw that it had covered Levi head to toe in filth. He was shaking with fury.

“Sorry!” he muttered to Petra, and then they all ran like anything. Petra wasn’t strong enough to run, and besides, she’d rather own up to the consequences of her own actions.

She stood trembling as she heard heavy footsteps up the stairs, and made sure to make eye contact with the furious Levi.

“Of course it was you,” he said sardonically, but mildly. “I should have known.”

“P-please allow me to clean the mess,” Petra said woefully, then froze as she realised that what she said was inappropriate considering she was talking about… well, him.

“I’m quite able to clean myself, thank you very much,” snapped Levi. “I think your efforts are better focused on not repeating mistakes, rather than fixing them. Have a care that you’re not making things worse for other team members.”

“Yes, Sir.” She wasn’t sure if she could handle much more considering she was having trouble with basic tasks, but she wouldn’t let herself avoid punishment.

He left without another word.  

It was at that moment that Petra realised that having no punishment was much worse that receiving one. Had he lost all hope in her? Was there any point to continue?

~*~

Levi was sitting on the couch in Erwin’s office, looking out the window at the recruits, preoccupied.

“You keep glancing out the window,” Erwin commented. “Is there someone that you’re particularly looking at?”

Levi’s eyes widened for a split-second. “She’s so fragile,” he said nonchalantly.

“Has she improved much?” Erwin’s uncanny ability to guess Levi’s thoughts didn’t leave him surprised.

“Yes, Taichou. But her strengths are not that of a typical fighter, although she may eventually hold her own.” Levi sighed. “She has heart. She’d be good for the emotional core of the team.”

“Something with which you’re unfamiliar at organising, then?”

“Hm.” Suddenly Levi looked at him. “Have you ever wanted to have a partner? Someone to share your burden? Your life?”

If Erwin was surprised, he didn’t show it. “I’ve chosen to not have a partner so I will not cause someone excess grief when I die. But there is no official rule. Do as you please, as long as it’s responsible. Any one of us may have a relationship as long as it’s done tastefully and doesn’t interfere with work.”

Levi remained silent, pondering his words.

Erwin smirked. “But if I were to choose someone, that Petra Ral girl seems quite nice.”

Levi looked up in shock, considering he hadn’t mentioned any names, and Erwin burst into deep laughter.

Even though Levi knew Erwin was just teasing, he got up, irritated, and strode towards the door to leave. Just before he got there, he stopped and leaned his head on the doorframe. “Is it so obvious?” he asked quietly.

Erwin gave a soft smile. “Only to me, Levi.”

“This could all go to hell,” he said, musing.

“That’s the spirit,” Erwin responded, pepping him up. “You’ve got nothing to lose.” Surely their daily precarious existence could qualify for _that_.

Levi smirked, and left.

~*~

A few months later, Levi called the entire squad to attention. “Today will be your first mission.”

A collective gasp came from the squad, which died down as Levi held up his hand.

“And I will be taking notes of who will be in the elite team. There are four positions. But I warn you, do not even think about it! Keep in the present or you may end up dead.”

The team saluted, and ran off to prepare.

~*~

Looking around, Petra saw the many terrified faces of the team on their horses. A lot of them were fighting their own survival instinct.

“Prepare yourselves!” shouted Levi. “I’ll follow close behind, but remember, this is a test. Only the strong will survive.”

Petra steadied herself.

“How’s it going?” a man next to her said. “I’m Gunther. You are?”

“Petra.”

He chuckled. “Don’t worry, Petra, I’ll protect you.”

Petra looked at him, annoyed. “Are you so skilled that you can actually defend someone as well as yourself? This is a test! I’d like to pass it the proper way.”

“Very well,” Gunther said, chuckling some more. “But if I see you get freaked out, then I’ll help you.”

A flare signalled the use of omnidirectional manoeuvring gear, and Petra jumped off her horse and flew into the air. Keeping alert, she flew forward, scouting for danger.

Her stomach was turning, and her bladder felt like it was bursting – maybe she’d taken Captain Levi’s instructions to avoid dehydration too far.

Out of nowhere, she felt her leg grabbed, and she was dragged to the side. In shock, she emptied her bladder.

Gunther laughed, next to her. “I just wanted to see whether you would scare, that’s all.” He then glanced backwards, and his expression turned to that of alarm.

Following his gaze, Petra saw something that made her want to get eaten by a Titan. To her horror, Levi was soaked in her urine. She didn’t realise that he literally meant that he’d stay close behind.

“H-heichou…” she stammered, looking apologetic.

Levi remained silent and easily passed both of them, looking like death warmed up.

About fifteen minutes later, something made her look at the trees in the distance. A split-second later, a gigantic titan lunged at her. She shrieked, and changed her trajectory.

Gunther came out from the trees and started to attack. He looked like he could handle it, but the titan was fast and didn’t give him many openings for his vital spot.

Seeing the exposed Achilles heel of the titan, Petra lunged forward and sliced it, then dashed upwards towards the trees.

“Just fire the flare!” Gunther shouted.

Nodding, Petra fired it in the sky, and then fired another straight into the titan’s eyes. Its remaining eye intact, it cried in pain and lunged towards her.

She was starting to tire. Adrenaline coursing through her body, she managed second by second to narrowly avoid the titan’s swipes at her.

Suddenly the titan yelled in pain, and Petra turned to see Gunther delivering the finishing blow. He smiled triumphantly, before getting thrown into a tree by the titan’s last blow before it melted into nothingness.

Petra ran towards him, horrified at his twisted leg.

“Just go without me,” he said weakly.

Thinking back to Levi reprimanding her for helping a fallen comrade in her training, she gripped her fist and shook her head. “We’re in this together,” she said strongly as she tried to pry him up.

His face showed that he was touched – one of the rare times she could see what he was actually feeling rather than some tough façade.

She removed her jacket and bound his knee, using some strapping to keep it immobile.

“Now, you can still use your gear – if we tie our straps together then you can use the left and I can use the right.”

Gunther nodded, looking reluctant for endangering her life. Petra saw his eyes flicker to a sheathed knife.

“Don’t worry about it,” she said, smirking as they went in the air.

She hoped that she was going in the right direction. More and more they could hear titans’ roars in the distance.

“Let’s rest on that branch,” she said, puffed out.

Gunther looked at her, worried, but acquiesced.

A second after they’d landed, a titan burst out of a nearby cave and sprinted towards them.

Without thinking, they activated their gear – they had both decided the direction instinctively.

Gunther gritted his teeth as the titan slowly gained ground. “I… appreciate what you’ve done, but I don’t want you to endanger yourself.”

“Don’t stab yourself!” said Petra strongly. “I’m not going to survive on my own, anyway – we need to trap him!”

Gunther looked perturbed, but resigned.

“Over there!” Petra said, looking to the right. “We can use that tree to swing upwards and hopefully the titan will have enough momentum to not be able to stop. But we need to make it look like an accident.”

“OK…. Aaaaaaggghhhh!” Gunther said, faking breaking his knee. They redirected towards the tree with a branch. Both of them fired their gear upwards, and they flew backwards in an arc.

The seconds felt like minutes as they helplessly followed their trajectory.

The titan looked to them, and leaped to the side, avoiding them.

Landing on the ground awkwardly which destroyed their gear, they could only watch as the titan beared down on them.

At the last second, its neck was sliced into pieces.

“Captain!” Petra gasped.

Levi finished the titan, then came to them. He didn’t look upset.

Petra gratefully looked at him, then lowered her eyes, ashamed.

Moments later, more scouts came and landed.

They were both carried back to safety.

~*~

Knowing that she had lived on borrowed time, Petra stood in the squad debrief, dejected.

“As you can see, there are much fewer people here now,” Levi said strongly. “It is true that there were more titans than anticipated, but that is the nature of what we are doing. I would like to commend all of you for surviving the first mission. With each mission, the study of titans progresses for the future of humanity. Therefore, I would also like to commend those who died on this mission. It takes an amount of bravery to recognise the death staring at every single human alive, and put themselves in a position which may create a future for us.”

Petra stood straighter. She could tell that others were inspired, despite the heavy losses.

“Now, it’s time to announce the four who will be in my elite team,” said Levi, beginning to pace down the line.

“Eld Jinn.”

“Gunther Schultz.”

“Oluo Bozado.”

“Petra Ral.”

Petra couldn’t help but start choking from the shock.

“Dismissed!”

She just stood there as Levi approached her.

“You want to know why I picked you? Because even when you make mistakes – horrible, _terrible_ mistakes – you still try your hardest. You push yourself. And... I suppose you also cause me to push myself, to overcome my personal dislikes.”

“Thank you, Heichou! I shall try harder!”

Levi looked at her, scared.

“I mean, try harder to fulfil my duty!”

“Saying something and acting on it are two very different things. You’re on probation, Petra Ral. And you still need to recognise your limits despite having good intentions.”

“Hai!” she replied, saluting strongly.

Levi nodded, and left.

~*~

“I picked her for the team,” Levi murmured, back in the office.

“So you chose her,” Erwin replied mildly.

Levi glanced at him, aware of the double entendre.

“Wouldn’t have anything to do with you wanting to protect her,” he said, smirking.

“I can remain objective,” Levi replied hotly.

Erwin’s smirk widened from the fact that Levi didn’t exactly deny it.

~*~

Over the next few weeks, Levi always looked extra angry around Petra. Petra was terrified, not knowing the reason for the change. But he noticed that she blushed less and less around him, even though she was becoming a jumbled mess of nerves.

Now alone, Levi sighed. It was obvious the girl cared for him. He thought of that part of him who wanted someone special, that didn’t want to be alone- ironically, he’d take anyone to be special.

He liked her. But should he make an advance? It was more likely that she was starstruck by him and his abilities and position, even though she still wanted him despite Hange saying that no one would once they found out he was a neat freak.

So, how to let her down gently without continuing his angry facade?

He smiled as he thought of the perfect solution. He’d tell her everything.

~*~

“Come with me, Petra Ral.”

“H-hai!” she said, saluting, and following him into his room. She was surprised to be called, and a bit worried about whether she’d done something inappropriate.

Levi turned to face her squarely. “Tell me honestly, do you love me?”

“Yes.” Petra was shaking.

“Those are big words. How can you love someone you don’t know? And I tell you, Petra Ral, you don’t know me.”

Taking a deep breath, he told her about his past, and how he stole to survive, killing when it gave him an advantage.

He narrowed his eyes. “Are you still attracted to someone who would swap your life without hesitation it suited them?”

She was hurt that he was telling her these things to push her away. But then she rallied herself, and decided to push forward despite the odds, as he’d taught her. “Heichou, all those things are in the past – it doesn’t matter. All that matters is how you are now.”

“The past makes up the person,” hissed Levi. “Maybe you’re not seeing me very clearly _now_ if you can’t see my past.”

“What I see… what I see is someone who pushes themselves and others day by day for the future of humanity, pushes past their own pain so others can lessen their pain. I see someone who values human life, and you are disrespectful to anyone who thinks otherwise. I don’t know if there have been, but it seems like there were probably a couple of people in your past who were special. It is hard to earn your trust and you are wary of people. You say that you will act selfishly, but I believe you would be loyal to those close to you. You have a good heart, Levi-heichou. I want to share everything with you – your pleasure, your pain.”

Levi let out a puff of air. “Stupid girl,” he said softly, shaking his head. But Petra was surprised to see a faint smile on his face.

She walked up to him and tried to kiss him.

He avoided it. “You don’t see me.”

“Yes, I do,” she pressed, eyes showing adoration and concern. Hurt by another avoidance, she stood back, crestfallen. “I am sorry. Of course you wouldn’t want to be with someone like me.” She turned to run but Levi gripped her wrist.

It was reflexive, and inappropriate if he were simply a commanding officer. He remained silent, not sure of what to say since he’d revealed his feelings, but his look of concern said it all.

She turned back to him, more hopeful. “You… you want me?”

Levi looked at her longingly, and stroked a stray bit of her hair back behind her ear. “Yes. I do.”

She brushed her hands over his chest, trembling at the intimacy. “Did you want to…”

Levi chuckled. “What, so soon? You’re acting as if I have legions of fangirls, or something.”

She blushed.

He smirked. “Well, it’s true that it is a part of a relationship. And in this job you have to live day by day.” He swooped her up in his arms, bridal style, and moved her to the bed.

“Petra… you do understand that if I’m hard on you it’s for your own good, so you have a better chance of survival?”

She giggled. “Yes. I do.”

Levi moved forward to kiss her, and they both started to undress.

~*~

Levi woke up the next morning, and rolled over to find Petra staring at him. She looked slightly worried, and his heart sank. Did she regret it?

“What’s wrong?” he asked gently.

“Did… did I qualify to be your girlfriend?”

Levi looked at her, shocked. “That was already established!”

“Oh!” she replied, giggling. “And after all the things I’ve done. I can’t believe it.”

“Hm, well, I thought you might have been marking your territory,” he said dryly, referring to the previous incident on her first mission.

She turned bright red.

He gathered her in his arms. “I promise to protect you.”

“You don’t need to do that,” she said lovingly. “If I lose my life, I will have no regrets.”

“Well, I promise to protect you, anyway,” he said, smiling and kissing her.

Breaking away, she chuckled. “While we’re moving quickly… do you want to get married?”

“Not really.”

Petra looked disappointed.

“It wouldn’t feel different to what we had now,” he added quickly. “I don’t know,” he said, snuggling into her. “If I’m married, the trainees may think I’m soft.” He planted a flurry of kisses on her while she giggled.

~*~

~*~

~*~

Levi stared at the lifeless corpse of his now-deceased lover, tearing off the scout’s logo as a memento.

“I’m sorry, Petra. I’m not good with promises. I’ve failed to protect you. And I’m also not so good with the ‘till death do us part’ bit, as I still love you even now.”


End file.
